Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (925): Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend. http://tfl.nu/f39g
  Replies (35) Good night (3678) Bad night (1180)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (608): We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother. http://tfl.nu/gjr6
  Replies (13) Good night (745) Bad night (4398)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (650): I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats. http://tfl.nu/rm40
  Replies (42) Good night (14348) Bad night (992)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here? http://tfl.nu/0w0h
  Replies (23) Good night (5199) Bad night (2288)
• Favorite

  (972): View more from Texas

  Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (972): Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama? http://tfl.nu/w817
  Replies (11) Good night (5193) Bad night (1379)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out. http://tfl.nu/g8zl
  Replies (27) Good night (5462) Bad night (2606)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (419): The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. . http://tfl.nu/zh9v
  Replies (24) Good night (7658) Bad night (1099)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message. http://tfl.nu/3foq
  Replies (6) Good night (2009) Bad night (608)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there. http://tfl.nu/8rlf
  Replies (8) Good night (977) Bad night (2945)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl. http://tfl.nu/btqg
  Replies (1) Good night (1387) Bad night (832)
• Favorite

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (828): It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it http://tfl.nu/e4ef
  Replies (9) Good night (2183) Bad night (545)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me http://tfl.nu/eiw2
  Replies (5) Good night (1093) Bad night (509)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner http://tfl.nu/mu1f
  Replies (2) Good night (286) Bad night (523)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk http://tfl.nu/d0l5
  Replies (0) Good night (633) Bad night (377)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me?? http://tfl.nu/odnb
  Replies (2) Good night (668) Bad night (327)

Randomize