You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Randomize
