butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
