There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
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