That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
So. Much. Porn.
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