I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
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