i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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