Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
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