The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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