no you cant smoke seaweed
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Randomize
