Your face is a jimmy john
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
His nipple licking is glorious
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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