I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Randomize
