His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
She even gives head with a lisp.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
