either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
