We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
