Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
