guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
He felt like a one man threesome
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
