The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize
