My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
