Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize