The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
We need a shit load of segways right now
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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