You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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