Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
