Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
