So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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