Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.