Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
