HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
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