I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
