Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize