oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
You pole danced in your parka.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
