Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
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