And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
a search helicopter?!
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Randomize
