my mouth tastes like poor choices
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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