"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
