I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
