I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Randomize