when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
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Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
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The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
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