i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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