nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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