Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
