Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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