That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
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After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
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Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I just wanna be euthanized