No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
