i would punch a child for taco bell
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize