that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Randomize
