North Korea, Best Korea!
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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