it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
