You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
4 words: hood of his car
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
