lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
