I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Damn victory sex feels great
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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